APPRECIATION-BEQUEATHING… A.K.A. THANKS-GIVING

11.21.07

So the day of gastric expansion is upon us again, and yet again comes the dreaded “let’s-go-around-the-table-and-share-what-we’re-thankful-for” ordeal. There are so few ways to avoid this awkward situation (short of passing out drunk at the holiday table) so this year I have resolved to come prepared with a list of what I am truly thankful for…

5. Superglue
This crazy little tube has saved my butt more times than I can count and it works on practically every project I’m crafting. To me it’s better than duct tape, albeit harder to get out of the drawer if it leaks... The fact that I often end up with fingers stuck together is just an added bonus.

4. Calluses
Some of these helpful finger-protectors come from #5 on the list and the numerous times I’ve glued myself, but more often then not they come from scissor and X-acto cuts, sanded fingers, needle pricks, fiber burns, hot glue blisters, layers and layers of paint in all shapes and forms, and the copious amounts of toxic chemicals I wasn’t supposed to touch but did anyway. They are my badges of honor for art.

3. Corporate Consumerism
This greed-inducing capitalist-machine may make many angry (or just broke), but really it’s the best way to make you want to stay home and craft the days away. Why buy it when you can make it yourself, re-craft something you own, or rejuvenate a thrift-store find. Obviously no one can get away from buying art and craft supplies, but restrictions on purchases really make me flex my creative muscle. Take that big business!!

2. Holiday Catalogues
As I speak some hardworking mail carrier is busy jam-packing your mailbox with these trite slick-sheeted booklets mass produced by #3. I can’t help myself, I’ve got to study every one until my cynical nature is drowning in its own sarcasm. The holidays are so commercialized now I can’t help but let my cynicism run loose to lampoon almost every holiday tradition. So I guess I must apologize in advance for the big December posting-frenzy Art Fiend and I are scheming. Be forewarned.

1. Sarcasm…
Well, this blog wouldn’t be the same without it, but really I’ll have to put “creativity” as my #1. If you’ve read my blog so far you’ve heard enough ranting on this subject. For those of you who haven’t- go read my very first post.

So that’s all for now. I hear the pumpkin pie calling my name…

-Lyzard